Was his life a triumph or a freak show? Will he be another Elvis?
What’s with all these celebrity deaths over the past 3-4 days? Farah Fawcett and Michael Jackson on Thursday, June 25th and then Billy Mays this morning.
To a degree, celebrities tend to drive me over the edge. The entertainment industry which I came to know while growing up is in marked contrast to what we see, hear and experience today. I remember when entertainers, stars and musicians truly "entertained and performed" for, what appeared to me, the true pleasure of what they did.
My impressions have changed. The goal now seems to be fame, money, "look at me," beauty, sex, neon and bright lights, clothes and at times just pure drama. Do the majority of the reality shows really entertain me? No and no. Am I star struck? No and no. Do I miss the Lawrence Welk show. Yes. Do I miss Mickey Mouse, the Little Rascals, Amos and Andy, Captain Kangaroo and I Love Lucy? Yes to all. And of course, Ed Sullivan and Red Skelton. They made us laugh, learn and help to appreciate life. Funny though. I find few TV programs which make us laugh anymore. I find few talk shows which help me to be a better person. I do find that many of the hosts of these talk shows are much like the entertainers. Power, money, control and narcissism. Oh, wow. Why does Oprah and Dr. Phil come to mind? Check out my post on Oprah here. (Yep. I admit that Dr. Oz on her show is definitely up and up. He knows his ’stuff.’)
And please don’t even ask me about the Academy Awards, the Grammies and the Tonys. Those with excessive love and admiration of themselves. Hey, please show and tell me how great I am and I’ll do the same for you (except I really don’t mean it in my heart). But yet, people can’t seem to get enough of the stars.
Of course I don’t blame all the stars. They depend upon the media blitz and hype to promote their agendas. What would they do without the talk shows, YouTube and Twitter? The media seems to fuel the fire which many Americans crave. I try to understand it all but it alludes me most of the time. And long before I was diagnosed with LBD.
Speaking of the media, let me get back to Farah, Michael and Billy. I remember well "Charlie’s Angels" without a problem. Need I say why? And that’s about it for Farah in my mind. I’ll remember Billy every time I think of or see Oxiclean.
And poor Michael Jackson. What kind of legacy will he leave? Looking at all of his fans now worshipping him after death makes me think I’m the odd guy out who isn’t with the program. (If we would worship God in the same way, the world would be a much better place). I probably won’t remember much of his music or dancing. Excuse me for being shallow for not appreciating his gifts to the world. It feels sad to me that the things I will remember Michael for are his deviations from the norm. Being erratic, peculiar, odd, and eccentric. I feel deeply sad and can only imagine his inner torment, confusion, chaos and demons with which he struggles. Was it from his past? Was he a victim of abuse? Was he a victim of his own gifts? How much control did he have over his childish behaviors and emotionally being a child even as a man? Of his distorted perception of his body and self image? He probably qualifies for the diagnoses of body dysmorphic disorder. How much of him was determined by nurturing or lack thereof versus many abnormalities of his brain cells and connections? I feel sorrow for his children who are innocent and had to be exposed to him not by choice. I feel sorrow for his mother. He was her son. I’m not sure about his father yet. I feel sad that people are trying to capitalize on his death to make money and for those people and some of the media who make public statements just to be politically correct. Rumors are only rumors until proven otherwise. Michael, I just hope you died in peace without any pain. I hope you had a strong spiritual piece to you and that you are in Heaven. I did respect you as a person.
Thankfully there are exceptions to all of this craziness. National Geographic. Educational programs. Public television and Mr. Rogers. And Whoopi, why can’t there be more like you. Someone who is unpretentious and says it just like it is! I won’t forget Sister Act.
Warmly………David
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A TRIP TO COSTCO
Yesterday I was at my local COSTCO buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, Biscuit, the Wonder Dog. While in the checkout line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.
What did she think I had, an elephant? So since I’m retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn’t have a dog and that I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn’t, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I’d lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.
I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)
Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff an Irish Setter’s ass and a car hit us both.
I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard.
Costco won’t let me shop there anymore.
Better watch what you ask retired people. They have all the time in the world to think of crazy things to say.
11 Types of Music that Soothe Dementia
by Paula Spencer, Caring.com senior editor
Why is it that I can remember the lyrics of every awful ’70s pop tune I catch the merest snatch of while turning a radio dial, but not the name of the street two miles away? The answer is good news; that is, if you spend time with someone who has Alzheimer’s, dementia, or Parkinson’s Disease.
Music lodges uniquely deep in the recesses of the brain–and therefore can still be tapped long after other abilities have failed. Musical memories are a complicated code of primal emotions, cognition, movement, and language. It both calms and provides sensory and social stimulation. But there’s an even better reason to bring singing, listening, playing, and dancing into the life of someone with a dementing illness: To provide them with the deep pleasure and reassurance brought by enjoying moments of wholeness and clarity.
For a person with a neurological impairment, music can “stimulate a sense of identity as nothing else can,” says neurologist Oliver Sacks, who writes about the evocative powers of music in last year’s bestseller, Musicophilia, and in the November issue of O magazine.
Long-term care facilities know this and use “music therapy.” But it struck me that home caregivers or family members might not realize this remarkably effective tool that’s right under their noses–or rather, ears.
Some ideas to try:
Heyday favorites. Unsure what the person has long liked (jazz, big band, classical)? Google “music era” with the decades during which the person was a teenager or in his or her 20s (1920s, 1940s, and so on).
Christmas carols. ‘Tis the season (so stores already tell us). Start with classics: Bing Crosby, Nat King Cole, Elvis, Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer.
Nursery rhymes. When I was a brand-new mother, I didn’t know any proper lullabies. So after I sang all the carols and Beatles songs I could think of, I went through Mother Goose. You’d be surprised how sing-songy and satisfying rhymes like “Jack and Jill” and “Hey Diddle Diddle” can be.
Hymns. Ask to borrow a hymnal from a place of worship to help you sing or play familiar standards on the piano.
Funny songs. Add the benefits of laughter with corny tunes like Tiny Tim’s “Tiptoe Through the Tulips” or my dad’s old favorites, “Mares Eat Oats” and “Hello Mudda, Hello Fadda” (by Allan Sherman).
Musicals. Listen to a soundtrack, or rent the movie version. Turn it up when Julie Andrews croons “My Favorite Things.”
TV-show theme songs. Google those words and you’ll find many CDs. After all, tunes like Archie and Edith Bunker’s “Those Were the Days” duet were the soundtrack for many an evening.
TV shows about music. One of my Dad’s favorites is “Don’t Forget the Lyrics” (Fox). There’s also “American Idol.”
Wandering minstrels. Sounds farfetched but it’s fabulous if your area happens to have a wonderful program like “Music for Seniors,” which musician and caregiver Sarah Martin McConnell founded in Nashville to bring area performers to seniors in care locations, day centers, and at home. (She says it’s the only such program she knows of, but she’d love to see it nationwide. As for me, I love it!)
Musical instruments. If the person played one, he possibly still can. Alternatives: Plucking a child’s zither or working a tambourine or xylophone.
Don’t forget to sing, use hand motions like clapping, and dance. People with Parkinson’s disease especially benefit from dancing.
Warmly………David
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