Simply Sitting and Staring into Space

I didn’t know what to blog about today. So I just went to what I was feeling.

Today is one of these days where I could just sit and stare. Maybe out the window. At the Christmas tree. At TV. At something. We all have those days. I am not depressed and I don’t feel apathetic or lazy. Could it be boredom? I usually don’t get bored. I won’t over analyze it though.

It occurs to me that I am able to verbalize this and to write it down. But what about those individuals who are more demented and are not able to articulate what they think and feel. Their feelings are still in there somewhere. And, yes. They also have days where they just want to simply sit and stare into space. Perhaps it is not related to their dementia at all. Maybe it’s just one of those days for them.

Ironically, younger people can do this and no one thinks a think of it. But when the elderly or demented folks do this, the automatic reaction is that “they’re really bad today.” He/she is totally unresponsive. Not talking. No eye contact. Just staring into space.”

Maybe we all need to reframe and begin to look at the fact that they may also just need a day where they need to sit and stare. And not read into it. Maybe it has nothing to do with their dementia. Just take it for what it’s worth. Don’t try to engage them if they are content to space out for the day. Inside, they are still feeling, thinking and mentally responding to external stimuli. To people talking. To sounds, sights and smells. Maybe we need to give them the pleasure of just experiencing…..just smelling the roses, so to speak. We spend most of our life hustling and bustling about that we don’t appreciate the little things around us. And, think about it. Allowing the elderly and demented to “have a day off” would take a big burden off their caregivers at least for a few hours!

Interesting. This makes perfect sense to me at the moment. I wonder what it will churn up when I read this one week from now? A month from now? Or one year from now? I hope it makes just as much sense to me then as it does now.

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6 Responses

  1. I think you’ll say it was a fine and wise post.

  2. On those days when I seem to just sit and stare, it doesn’t feel uncomfortable to me. It doesn’t even arouse guilt at not doing something. Personally, I think of it like a kind of protracted reverie, because I am very much aware of myself at those times, but less aware of any of the tasks or needs that might be in front of me.

    “Reverie” sounds so friendly and pleasant, and it is SUCH a relief from the anxiety that often inhabits me.

  3. well said- now I just have to figure how I can have some time to just be.

  4. I loved Carol’s reply to you David. I have had days like that myself. I feel very comfortable with myself, by myself, so staring is great at times.

    My Don on the other hand always had to have interaction with other people, the TV, or something to do with people. When he sat and stared for hours on end, day after day, then I worried that something was developing that should not have been. It wasn’t an occasional event.

    May your good old fashioned day dreaming always be pleasant.

  5. All I can add is God bless you and keep you in the everlasting arms.

  6. Sometimes it’s just nice to sit and just be. To listen to our own thoughts, to forget the busy world around us.
    It rejuvenates me at times, helps me think, and rests my mind and body.
    I think it’s a good thing..once in a while.
    I’m glad you are feeling better.
    love and kisses Helene

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